The Olympics and Paralympics are over and our teams have won so many medals. Our last medal to award is Bronze, third place, f0r truly terrible car keys.

epa03349592 Max Hoff of Germany celebrates and bites his bronze medal in the Kayak Single (K1) 1000m Men race during the London 2012 Olympic Games Canoe Sprint competition at the Eton Dorney Rowing Centre near the village of Dorney, west of London, Britain, 08 August 2012. EPA/Rainer Jensen


Third Place – Bronze medal position

Renault Keycards

If you have a Renault, there’s a good chance you have a small credit card sized key that you insert into a slot….that’s if the buttons on the card still work so that you can get into the car of course.

Broken Keys-0070(1)


These are a terrible idea. Why would you encase a flat fragile circuit board within thin fragile plastic and then entrust it with starting the car?




So where do we start with these? Well they have a virtual chip , I could rant on all day about these but I won’t. Needless to say that if you have a Renault, you should be well aquainted with the phrase ‘Card Not Detected’.

card not detected

The cards have been designed to be just the right size to put into your trouser pocket, (which is great until you sit down…) They bend, break, go on the blink. The buttons, that are part of the circuit board, have a lifespan equal to that of a Mayfly. The most delicate part, the battery holder, is what keeps it all going may and may as well be made from kitchen foil ! ….IT IS A JOKE…there that’s off my chest.


The result is that should the buttons give up, and the emergency key blade actually fit into the emergency lock, and the emergency lock actually work…then after all that, odds are that the keycard won’t be detected so it was all a waste of time. The most amazing thing is that Renault are still using this terrible idea in the latest generation of cars…a terrible idea for anyone driving them.




0 replies

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *